When the Moon was Ours

End Date:  July 29th

Author:  Anna-Marie McLemore

Published:  2016

Genre:  Young Adult / Fantasy

Pages:  288 (hardcover)

Selected By:  Elle Tea

Average Review:  Scoring No Like Book

“To everyone who knows them, best friends Miel and Sam are as strange as they are inseparable.  Roses grow out of Miel’s wrist, and rumors say that she spilled out of a water tower when she was five.  Sam is known for the moons he paints and hangs in the trees and for how little anyone knows about his life before he and his mother moved to town.  But as odd as everyone considers Miel and Sam, even they stay away from the Bonner girls, four beautiful sisters rumored to be witches.  Now they want the roses that grow from Miel’s skin, convinced that their scent can make anyone fall in love.  And they’re willing to use every secret Miel has fought to protect to make sure she gives them up.”

Border Vine 1

Gigglemug Reviews

Elle Tea:  Scoring No Like Book

So.  Yes.  I picked this one.  I’ll own it.  I did it.  This is all my fault.  But it sounded so promising!!!  It was a recommendation, cited as a book “… like The Night Circus.”  And, honestly, that’s saying a lot – The Night Circus was friggin’ flippin’ effin’ amazing… But making that comparison, as I’ve now seen many do, also sets this book up for failure.  I imagined something with YA messages like, “It’s okay to be you,” and, “Don’t worry about what other people think – the right people will accept you no matter what,” all wrapped up in magical realism with a touch of fantasy, similar to The Girl Who Drank the Moon.

But, alas… it was not to be.

First, and I hate that this is even necessary, let me just preface all of what I’m about to say with this statement:  this review is solely about this book and the way it was written, its character development, and the… well, not the plot, because there wasn’t one, but suffice it to say that my review is only about the book.  I honestly couldn’t give a shit less who you sleep with, so long as it’s all consensual, nor do I care about what you wear, how you live, or what you choose to do, so long as you’re not hurting anyone else to do it (and I include animals in that “anyone else”).  There seems to be so little happiness and good will left in the world that I can only commend people who are able to find it, however they find it and whomever they may find it with.  Good on ya, mate.

Second, I can only assume this book is doing as well as it is because of its subject matter.  Either people are afraid of giving it a bad score because they don’t want to be labeled as bigots or have it assumed that they have something against LGBT people, or it’s due to the lack of books like this on the market.  There aren’t that many books out there that focus on transgender relationships, especially in the YA genre.  And while you may currently be the sort of person who will only drink water which has been run through a filtration system, I do believe if you were lost out in the desert for days on end, you’d eventually take at least a sip of your own urine, and you’d find yourself, as the days wore on, thinking more and more, “Hey, if I close my eyes I can pretend it’s lemonade.”

All of that being said, the one good thing – the sole reason I gave this book one teacup (did not like) rather than none (hated) – was that very same subject matter.  Mostly the whole bacha posh cultural practice, of which I knew nothing.  So, this book did open my eyes to some new knowledge, and I truly believe one can never know enough about… well… everything.  So there was that.  (If you’re interested in learning more about that fascinating, liberating, and tragic practice, there is a plethora of information available online, as well as a few free documentaries on YouTube that are well worth a watch.)

But the bad.  God, there was just so much bad.

There’s no plot.  That’s a big deal-breaker for me when it comes to books.  I don’t want to shuffle aimlessly through your pages without purpose.  It begins as confusing as hell, with the two major characters – Miel and Sam – swirling around the pronoun and moniker game: one moment Miel is Miel, the next she is Honey; one moment Sam is Sam, the next he is Moon; she and he and him and her are used randomly… and maybe that was intentional.  Maybe the author was trying to show that the characters are just as confused about their own identities as we are by page two.  If that’s the case, then I commend her for having had a plan when she began the book, but beyond that…

There is a family of witches who aren’t actually witches but are really just a group of spoiled, rather slutty teenage girls who can apparently get away with murder so long as they’re together.  There’s an aunt-sister-cousin-roommate who’s really a long-lost relative of the opposite sex and a totally different age.  There are pumpkins, for some reason, and they sometimes turn to glass, for some reason, which turns to stars… for some reason.  There’s a mother who wants her daughter to want to make up her damn mind.  There’s a river that’s sometimes a magical miracle-working life-giver, sometimes a cold-blooded killer, and sometimes a road for lit-up gourmet pumpkins.  There’s a girl who licks honey from a knife a lot, and when she’s not actively licking said honey from the aforementioned knife, people are daydreaming about her licking honey from a knife, which means we have to read about all the times in the past when she licked honey from a knife.  There’s a boy who knows a lot about the moon and fashions moon-lanterns out of painted paper, which he hangs all over town to cheer people or let others know what sort of mood he’s in, and who spends most of his time contemplating two things: whether or not the honey-licking, co-dependent, doormat of a girl loves him as much as he loves her, and whether or not he should or should not wear a dress to please a dead woman.  A man tries to save his family from a centuries-old curse and gets thrown out of town for his trouble.  A woman tries to destroy a child to save it and ends up a sorta-kinda ghost-type disembodied voice… sorta… kinda… thing.  A child gives his life for love, then gains another life in return.

Oh, and there’s an empty coffin made of stained glass just sitting out in the middle of the woods.  Just… you know.  Because I guess there was no place else to put it.  Or something.

Of the two protagonists, Sam was the easier for me to follow – most of the time.  While I couldn’t personally relate with his struggle, I could empathize with him enough to understand his dilemma – it would be a terrible thing to be trapped in a body that responded to your commands but didn’t feel like yours.  I found Miel, on the other hand, pretty unlikable from the start: besides her mousy, timid nature, there was the fact that she walked right into danger time and time again, and it was up to Sam to save her… time and time again.  (So apparently even in books in which the characters are transgender, girls still need saving.  ::sigh::)

Beyond that, there was very little character development, with all of the characters remaining pretty much the same until the end, meandering as they did from page to page, setting to setting, repeating themselves and their actions until… boom, the last few chapters, when it finally all came to an end and something like resolution was achieved.

The writing was… Well, it wasn’t The bloody Night bloody Circus, that’s for bloody sure.  Nor was it anywhere close to The Girl Who Drank the Moon.  McLemore was clearly going for whimsical, fairy-like tones, but all that she achieved was a mishmash of vague, repetitive, rather elementary imagery.  The magic in The Night Circus and The Girl Who Drank the Moon – as well as other successful fantastical, magical, whimsically-written novels readily available – is believable because the authors make it believable.  They make you and I feel that anything is possible within the settings and realms they have created, and their lyrical writing styles fit the stories they’re telling while still remaining sensible enough to understand and convey the imagery they wish us to see.  When not boring me to death with its repetitiveness, When the Moon was Ours was written in a vague, forced style that I found thoroughly unpalatable.  If I were to say, “It’s really humid, so please excuse me if my hair goes all Medusa on me,” Morgenstern might translate it as something along the lines of: “My hair writhes in the viscous air,” while McLemore would say instead something like:  “In air like vegetable oil, the gorgons rise to crown her peak while a girl licked honey off a knife.  Again.”

Soooo…  To summarize: if you’re thirsty for a genuinely thought-provoking, whimsically-written book, check out Erin Morgenstern, Kelly Barnhill, and Catherynne Valente.  But if you’re a transgender teen struggling to find something with which you may be able to relate – or someone who is trying to relate to a transgender person themselves – then shut your eyes, hold your breath, tell yourself this is just lemonade, and take a swig; it won’t sustain you for long, but it might fool you into a false sense of satisfaction.

Elle Tea’s Favorite Character(s):  The pumpkins.  Because who knew there were so many kinds of bloody pumpkin?!

Elle read the Amazon Kindle version of this selection.

Border Vine 2

BillMo:  Scoring It Was OK Book

I didn’t like this book.  There.  I said it.  I don’t have anything against transgendered people, but this book was pretty awful.

First off, let me say that if Rocky and Bullwinkle had a transgendered cartoon, I think this would be it.  I can just picture them running across the background as some of the story was unfolding, and at the end of it would have one of those “… and that’s the moral of the story” blurbs which would read something like:  “Don’t bully people for being different.”  I can get behind that moral – just, please… don’t ever make me read this book again to show my solidarity.  In fact, if you ever do see someone bullying someone for their sexuality, gender identity, or, well, anything, you should actually force them to read this book – but you should make them do so aloud, that way you know that they’re actually reading it.

Of course, this would backfire, since you’d be punishing yourself, too.

At the beginning, I was totally confused as to who the characters were.  Were we supposed to be focusing on Honey, Moon, Miel, Sam, which is which, who is who, who is “she” and who is “he” and why the hell does it matter right now???  I just didn’t know.  Eventually I did get there, but it was just a really confusing way to start out a book.  Also, the entire book felt like the author was just trying too hard to fit into the fantasy niche; the prose was so vague and the imagery was so repetitive that it all felt forced.  I wasn’t even sure when this book took place, or where: Was this supposed to be in the past?  If so, how and when, because they had cell phones and cars.  Was this America?  Mexico?  Canada?  Is this the future?  What is happening and who are all these people??!!

Miel.  Gah, effin’ Miel – she annoyed me to no end.  It was like she intentionally put herself in bad situations; I mean, I used to be pretty naive, and sometimes I still am, but she was just ridiculous.  *****SPOILER ALERT***** >>>  I mean, she was all like – Oh no, you want my flowers!  You can’t have them, and I’m going to go and tell you to your big mean stupid face that you can’t have them, that way you can just place me right back into this stained-glass coffin in the middle of no-goddamn-where until I agree to be a good little girl again.  Which brings up another point – was that coffin supposed to be some sort of nod or twist on the whole Snow White fairy tale?  Because if so, Walt Disney is going to unfreeze himself just so he can tell you how little sense having that thing in this story even made.  <<< *****END SPOILER*****

Oh, there was a river in this story, too.  And it was magical, boys ‘n girls.  A magical river… that is only magical sometimes.  Someone should complain to the Mayor or management, because that thing got worse reception from Magicland than I get with my wi-fi.

Gah, I don’t even want to write anymore about this.  I just do not recommend this book, and I don’t want to list the quotes I even managed to like.

Until next time.  🙂

BillMo’s Favorite Character(s):  Nobody.

Bill read the Amazon Kindle version of this selection.

Border Vine 2

Lady Esbe:  Scoring No Like Book

Caveat:  Lady Esbe did not finish reading this selection.

At the risk of being too direct, this will be a short one for me.  I did not finish this selection as I could not stomach the pointless meanderings of this author.  It is very rare that I even refuse to skim to the end of the book.  Oh no, I could absolutely care less about who did what, when, where, why and with whom.  To put it plainly and succinctly, this book is about kids who don’t quite fit in and their bully’s.  Nothing so mystical about that, even though the author tries to make it so.

The mysterious girl who comes from the water tower doesn’t quite fit in from the word go.  Awkward teen? Absolutely.  McElmore beat us about the head about the hem of her dress never being quite dry and the roses growing out of her arms.  Maybe she would have gotten to the point by the end of the novel, I just did not have the patience to get there.  I’m sure she wanted us to feel sympathetic toward Miel.  There may have been a tickle at first, but by time she started musing over the Bonner sisters I was seriously over Miel’s circuitous ponderings.  Most of those ponderings centered around Sam.

I really wanted to be one hundred percent behind Sam.  The kindness he showed to people who most definitely did not deserve it was something to admire.  However, the abuse he suffers at the hands of Miel, as innocent and self-centered as it is, drove me up the wall.  As with many teens, Sam is strong within himself and not truly having an identity crisis.  It’s those around him who are in crisis about his identity.  Again, McElmore droned on and on about this and I just couldn’t take it.  Such is life, people don’t like who you are or want to be and they seek to change you.  Again, nothing mystical about that either.

The two adult women who are presented with any prominence in this piece are Aracely and Sam’s mom (sorry, her name escapes me and no, it is not important enough for me to look it up).  Aracely appears to be wise and all knowing, curing people of their love sickness.  It is not enough that the two main characters need to or have changed in their life, she also sticks Aracely in the same boat.  Honestly, I could get very analytical about Aracely’s transformation, but I simply do not care except to say, “how many characters are having serious identity crises or changes?”  As for Sam’s mother, she’s not helping Sam’s cause because she is pushing for him to behave one way but expect different end result years down the line.  There is quite a deal of scorn coming from both Aracely and Sam’s mother toward Miel and Sam.  Well, we can chalk that up to having to carry the burden of their secrets, but again, no big mystery there either.

Finally, we have the Bonner sisters.  The best I can liken it to is that clique of popular girls in high school that seem to have it all, but are inherently flawed and miserable themselves.  We’ve all witnessed their own self destruction in high school and this is no different in this book.  They bully those who are different to make themselves feel more complete.  They chase after boys who “should be so thrilled” that one of these beautiful girls chose them.  Yeah, not so much.  No matter how you cut it, they are miserable human beings seeking to make themselves feel less miserable by any means necessary.

I said, this would be short and I meant it.  I am glad I purchased the hard back copy so I wouldn’t “lose” money on it.  Back on my Amazon seller account it went in short order.  I didn’t care for the writing style, subject matter or lack thereof in my opinion or the characters.  So there was no winning this for me.  I am with Elle Tea, I do not know who compared this to the Night Circus, but they need to be smacked.

Lady Esbe’s Favorite Character(s):  No one.

Esbe read the Thomas Dunne / St. Martin’s Griffin hardcover version of this selection.

Border Vine 2


Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s